Saturday, October 13, 2012

Long Weekends.

He greeted me with a half-hearted stretch this morning.  I think the belly is stretching his skin a bit much and he stops after reaching out with his paws.  He doesn't follow through all the way to the tip of his tail like he used to.  We slept with the window open and it was wonderful.  I don't keep the air conditioning very low as I don't actually DO much around here in the summer anyway, so I don't mind, but I have worried that he may be uncomfortable.  He has a corner in the office/studio that is on the tile and he will sit in there while I type.  Sometimes he stays after I leave.
He has started protesting being petted.
He was NEVER a cuddler, but when he was sick before we would commune.  He would not put up with my lap but always found a flat spot from chin to belly on me to sleep most of the night.  In the winter, I think he found it too warm.  He will pop up beside me (always just as I am starting to doze off....) and say hi, but when I pet him, he backs off.....
I notice him staring off into space.
Last week he had a couple of tummy upsets but he is eating the wet food (OH, how much I hate that stuff!  I was so proud he never bothered me with opening cans because I gave in to begging etc.  NOW he will brazenly reach up to sniff the french fries I bring into the house... just in case he wants it!) and it moves past the mass quite handily.
What a trouper.
He doesn't like fingers.  He bites.... but he LOVES to rub against my toes.


Friday, October 12, 2012

The Photos of the End

I have to show you what stopped my life cold last month.

The Dude now looks like a pregnant girl with a four or five kitten litter ready to pop.  I must say, he actually acts that way too.  But... I was explained that the BIG WHITE BALL (a month ago... this was about the size of my fist) is a tumor.  Nothing more or less.  The little blip open space at the high spot near his spine is his stomach, the couple of blops at the bottom are  his bowel.

He has been eating soft food and I am setting my own time table:  When he doesn't have a bowel movement for three days or he begins vomiting a lot, I will know it has taken up all of his digesting space and we will have to make arrangements.....

..... but..... this time there is NO good outlook.  Anyone who has a vet in town that actually thinks they want to whittle him away would be welcome, but I cannot pay.  I am reactivating my go fund me account, to see if I can give the extra to my own absolutely wonderful vet who has worked with me so long and been so generous.  I am WAY behind, and fighting to pay the other bills. JUST something to feel like I am useful.

MEANWHILE, he is absolutely normal.
I was thinking of renaming the blog "Dead Cat Walking" but although morbidly humorous, I can't sustain the giggle that I had when he merrily waddled away and took a swipe at my foot on the way.

This post may not last long.  I just needed to vent... I mostly just watch him sleep and see him inhaling and exhaling and it makes me happy.....
Thanks to you all.  I really can't tell you how much I appreciated EVERY single one of you.
dj*